Guess who is actually writing when she said she would? This girl! Enjoy it while it lasts. (I started out on time. But obviously it didn't make it).
I want to talk a little bit about the things that I am learning, not just the things that I am doing. I realize that I don't add in as much about that, if anything, when I make these posts. SO if you are looking for an easy post to read and know what I am up to, please refer to the previous post: Incense and Peppermints.
I have been meaning to write this all weekend, but I just never got around to it. Sorry! I am done pretending that I can actually post things on time. So let's just go with the idea that if I post: Great! If I don't post: Great! It will be a surprise for all of us when I actually get something up.
So, I don't know exactly what you want to hear about what life is like here or what I am learning. But I will just write, stream of consciousness style, and I pray something will eventually make sense.
I am realizing just how young and immature I am. I am like a new star, I feel like I have been around forever but when I am compared with the other stars I find that my lifetime is nothing compared to theirs. I am still a star, which is wonderful, but I am no where near the maturity level of the others. The people I talk to and interview are the old stars, the sages, the gurus, they who have had a glimpse of what all is out there. Through their knowledge I can find a peace of my own and can settle into my 'starhood' and be okay with my short life. I know there is so much more to follow; I need to take this part slowly and allow it to fill me. The important thing is that I am learning to pick what I allow to fill me. There is simply too much to savor it all; it is a shame but it is the honest truth. We have the agency to choose what fills us and makes us who we are, I want it to be good things.
So I meditate. I do yoga. I find the things that I truly and honestly enjoy. Yoga is a passion that I am only realizing that I have. I used to do it back in the States, but not like here. Here, yoga is a way of life; it is a passage to finding the Ultimate Truth. No, it is not 42. It is 42 plus some. And then some. And then some. It is a part of your everyday experiences, it is a part of you. I believe that God is too merciful to allow there to be only one path of truth on the Earth. Every religion has an aspect of truth for people to cling to and to love. When you love the Ultimate Truth, you learn what that feels like so you can recognize it the next time it happens. You feel that spirit and you know that feeling comes when you interact with the divine in some way.
You know this interaction. It is when you feel the chills run up and down your spine and you just know something is right, or perfect, or especially beautiful. Maybe you feel some kind of burning in your heart that it feel you have suddenly been filled with an inexplicably transcendent mood. You feel as though your mind encompasses the entirety of the cosmos at once and that you had a glimpse of something bigger than you are. The feeling is subtle and sometimes you can miss it. This all happens in an instant, you feel it and then it is gone. The reason I bring it up is because I feel it here constantly. In mundane conversation, in the interviews that I hold, in the pooja (prayers to deities), in meditation mantras, in the examples that I see in people's lives, in my own thoughts. For some reason this environment is much more conducive to this kind of thought. There is a poem that I am reminded of: Derrick Brown's "A Finger Two Dots Then Me".
The reason I called this post the Lotus Mudra is because that is the mudra for opening your heart and for intentioned thought. A mudra is a position that you hold the hands for yoga in order to access a subtle aspect of the body. Here is a picture of a lotus mudra. I want everyone who reads to try to open their heart to feel that embrace by the cosmos. Open your heart to the holiness around you and feel it now, not after the fact.
I want to talk a little bit about the things that I am learning, not just the things that I am doing. I realize that I don't add in as much about that, if anything, when I make these posts. SO if you are looking for an easy post to read and know what I am up to, please refer to the previous post: Incense and Peppermints.
I have been meaning to write this all weekend, but I just never got around to it. Sorry! I am done pretending that I can actually post things on time. So let's just go with the idea that if I post: Great! If I don't post: Great! It will be a surprise for all of us when I actually get something up.
So, I don't know exactly what you want to hear about what life is like here or what I am learning. But I will just write, stream of consciousness style, and I pray something will eventually make sense.
I am realizing just how young and immature I am. I am like a new star, I feel like I have been around forever but when I am compared with the other stars I find that my lifetime is nothing compared to theirs. I am still a star, which is wonderful, but I am no where near the maturity level of the others. The people I talk to and interview are the old stars, the sages, the gurus, they who have had a glimpse of what all is out there. Through their knowledge I can find a peace of my own and can settle into my 'starhood' and be okay with my short life. I know there is so much more to follow; I need to take this part slowly and allow it to fill me. The important thing is that I am learning to pick what I allow to fill me. There is simply too much to savor it all; it is a shame but it is the honest truth. We have the agency to choose what fills us and makes us who we are, I want it to be good things.
So I meditate. I do yoga. I find the things that I truly and honestly enjoy. Yoga is a passion that I am only realizing that I have. I used to do it back in the States, but not like here. Here, yoga is a way of life; it is a passage to finding the Ultimate Truth. No, it is not 42. It is 42 plus some. And then some. And then some. It is a part of your everyday experiences, it is a part of you. I believe that God is too merciful to allow there to be only one path of truth on the Earth. Every religion has an aspect of truth for people to cling to and to love. When you love the Ultimate Truth, you learn what that feels like so you can recognize it the next time it happens. You feel that spirit and you know that feeling comes when you interact with the divine in some way.
You know this interaction. It is when you feel the chills run up and down your spine and you just know something is right, or perfect, or especially beautiful. Maybe you feel some kind of burning in your heart that it feel you have suddenly been filled with an inexplicably transcendent mood. You feel as though your mind encompasses the entirety of the cosmos at once and that you had a glimpse of something bigger than you are. The feeling is subtle and sometimes you can miss it. This all happens in an instant, you feel it and then it is gone. The reason I bring it up is because I feel it here constantly. In mundane conversation, in the interviews that I hold, in the pooja (prayers to deities), in meditation mantras, in the examples that I see in people's lives, in my own thoughts. For some reason this environment is much more conducive to this kind of thought. There is a poem that I am reminded of: Derrick Brown's "A Finger Two Dots Then Me".
I say to him… why do I call you God?
He says ‘Because Grand Poobah sounds ridiculous.’
(Who knew he was so witty?)
I ask him ‘Lord, so many poets have tried to nail it and missed, what is holy?’
At that moment,
the planets begin to spin and awaken
and large movie screens appear on Mars, Saturn and Venus
each bearing images I have witnessed
and over each and every clip flashes the word holy.
armadillos–holy
magic tricks–holy
cows’ tongues–holy
snowballs upside the head–holy
clumsy first kisses–holy
sneaking into movies–holy
your mother teaching you to slow dance
the fear returning
the fear overcome–holy
eating top ramen on upside-down frisbees
cause it was either plates or more beer–holy
drunk beach cruiser nights–holy
the $5.00 you made in vegas
and the $450.00 you lost–holy
the last time you were nervous holding hands–holy
feeling God at a pool hall but not church–holy
sleeping during your uncle’s memorized dinner prayer–holy
losing your watch in the waves and all that signifies–holy
the day you got to really speak to your father cause the television broke–holy
the day your grandmother told you something meaningful
cause she was dying–holy
Everything can be holy if we make it, if we intentionally think of something and lend it meaning. How much more meaning would any of these experiences have if we had thought they were holy at the time? What would we have learned?
The reason I called this post the Lotus Mudra is because that is the mudra for opening your heart and for intentioned thought. A mudra is a position that you hold the hands for yoga in order to access a subtle aspect of the body. Here is a picture of a lotus mudra. I want everyone who reads to try to open their heart to feel that embrace by the cosmos. Open your heart to the holiness around you and feel it now, not after the fact.
I have more thoughts, but I think this should do it for today. I'll try to post more stuff like this, not just what I am doing.
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